There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Randomize
