Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
