you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
