i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
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