Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Randomize
