I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
