It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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