Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
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