I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
