my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
