His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
