Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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