I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Randomize
