Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
