When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
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