It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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