waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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