If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize
