soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Randomize