I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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