Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
