he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
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