wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Randomize
