So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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