I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Randomize
