I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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