Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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