Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Randomize
