I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
