My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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