he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize