i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
