he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
so much tequila, so little girl.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize