After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
