U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
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