ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
I'm both gender and math confused
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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