"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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