exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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