thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
