My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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