Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
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