No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
