Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
