how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
