Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Randomize
