I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
Randomize
