well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
