is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
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