Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
