You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Randomize
