I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
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